Mar 24 2009
Birthday by Whitney G
Yes, today is my birthday. At 6:39 a.m. Central time, I turned 28. That pretty much puts me firmly in the category Too Old to Still Be Reading YA Fiction, I’m sure, but I’ve always been one to defy convention.
I’ll be the first (but far from the last) to tell you that I don’t handle birthdays well. All they do for me is remind me of my mortality. Plus, after you turn 21 and can legally get plastered at a bar, there’s really no other birthday to look forward to…except for maybe your 55th, when you can get that sweet Hardee’s/Carl’s Jr. discount. I’m usually in a funk for the entire month of March. The last birthday that I didn’t mind was 23. I don’t know why I’m so attached to 23, but that just seems like a good age for me. I don’t feel 28, at all, and when I’m out doing grownup things like leading efforts at work, I’m thinking, Wait, this isn’t right. I’m too young for this. And then I remember that I’m almost 30, and I have a brief nervous breakdown. Maybe this is one of the reasons why people have children, to sort of force themselves to accept the fact that they are indeed adults. But my husband and I aren’t going to reproduce, and our cats don’t really force the same sense of responsibility on us.
I didn’t really mean for this post to turn into philosophical navel-gazing. The bottom line is that I’m getting older, and it sort of sucks, but it sure as hell beats being like a dog in a Fear Street book (i.e., deceased). So I’m just going to keep feeling like I’m stuck at 23, and constantly being surprised that I am, indeed, considered an adult human being.
In honor of my birthday, I here is a little doll of myself as a bat-alien-monster from Monster, complete with the gold amulet around my neck, the evil lake behind me, and Plastic at my side. Because nothing says “all growed up” like playing with dolls!
Man, I totally meant to wish you a happy birthday and then I got caught up in your Monster review and forgot. Sorry! I hope it was a good one. Welcome to 28! (And hey, you’re never too old to read YA fiction!)
Aw, thank you, Shannon!
Whitney,
You would be amazed the effects magnets have on water and on human beings. I just happened to be ahead of my time. You need to study more modern physics before passing judgement on the science elements of my novel. A simple home test will show what a powerful magnet can do to water. Place a glass of water under the north pole of a magnet overnight and you will notice two immediate changes in the H2O. It will have less surface tension and it will act as a stronger solvent than ordinary water.
Sleep with a strong magnet near your head and you will start to go mental. Better yet, avoid that experiment, it is too dangerous.
Pike
[...] seriously. He posted a comment here. I thought that was pretty damn cool. I’m always impressed by authors who communicate [...]
ew hes so up himself